The feeling not the words

I could use the words to express the feeling

If I knew what exactly I was feeling

Words ramble out but are they ever anything more then what I want to be true

I've been writing as a way to search

And try to reveal who I am

But how do I know if that is expressed with any accuracy

Yet I still feel so exposed

And I struggle sometimes to put it out there 

Even while trying to hide

But there is something painful that you never come looking

I can rhyme and symbolize and describe

But it's all for show

I don't know who I am or what I'm doing 

And I feel like a fuck up on most days 

But I still want you to love me

There's a selfishness about that that is nowhere near pretty/beautiful

And they say that doesn't belong in true love

But I'm in the middle of thinking they don't know what the fuck they're talking about

And maybe that makes these words as honest as any